6 Green Flags You Need to Stop Overlooking in People, According to a Psychologist

We've all heard about relationship 'red flags' we need to be aware of, but what about shining a light on someone's incredibly wonderful traits?

Surrounding yourself with people who show 'green flags' can help you create a more fulfilling and positive life. Even on the days when nothing seems possible (for example, when we're all stuck in lockdown), you know there are those special people in your life who will be there for you to support you through the hardship.

We asked Lysn psychologist Nancy Sokarno to reveal the six biggest green flags to look out for in friends, family and intimate relationships.

6 Relationship Green Flags You Need to Stop Overlooking

1. You can be yourself

There’s no better feeling than being comfortable in your own skin when you’re around someone. Everyone should be able to embrace, accept and love themselves, and it’s even better when the other person loves you for the person you truly are. If that other person makes you feel as though you can be your true self, this is a green flag.

2. You make each other laugh

Having someone in your life that makes you laugh often — and laugh hard — can be the best feeling in the world. Being able to smile and have lots of fun together in any relationship is always a plus. Laughter has the ability to heal us physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

There's ample research to distinguish that laughter has the power to bring us together and it has a better impact when shared. Shared laughter can help us to connect and communicate, which strengthens our relationships and binds people together. Researchers attribute laughter to release some pretty feel-good endorphins causing us to feel euphoric and in turn, leave us experiencing better emotional health and lowered levels of stress.

3. You have similar morals

Whatever you want to call it – morals, ethics, values or outlook — you can often tell a relationship is on the right track if you find out early on that they’re similar. Having an outlook on life that is similar to the other person can bond you together during difficult times and bring you joy during happy times.

4. You feel respected

When you have respect for each other, you come to accept the person for who they really are — flaws and all. Showing mutual respect also means that you’re able to tolerate each other when things might not go your way. Respect allows you to understand each other on a different level, recognising each other’s capabilities and limitations.

5. You can openly communicate

Great communication can enable you both to successfully navigate life together. Ensure that you’re both able to see each other’s perspectives and at times, put yourself in the other person’s shoes to really understand how they feel and how things might be affecting them.

Being able to have open and honest discussions about the past and present will always help a relationship know how to move forward. Having open communication also allows you to set clear boundaries between each other about what is appropriate and what isn't, so you can both be on the same page in regards to expectations.

6. You have comfortable silences

Comfortable silences aren’t easy to come by so when you have them with someone else, you know you’re onto a winner. If you can enjoy each other’s company without needing a distraction or needing to fill the silence in some way, it’s a definite green light.

Nancy Sokarno is a psychologist at Lysn. Lysn is a digital mental health company with world class wellbeing technology which helps people find their best-fit professional psychologist whilst being able to access online tools to improve their mental health.

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